I have come to leave a message to the millions and billions of people who are reading this.
First, I would like to apologize to my father and my entire family, which is why I was arrested away from our house.
I'm not innocent as I have seemed. I've done some very naughty things behind your backs the entire time. But I'm tired of this whole purity game. I'd rather be a criminal than live a stupid boring normal life.
But don't worry! Everyone will be treating me very well in jail.
And I will become famous. Oh-so famous! So famous I will probably become the most famous person in the world. It can't be helped. I'm just too weird, funny, crazy, embarrassing, and fascinating to not to be #1 in the entire universe.
This is all part of a wonderful and brilliant plan I've improvised today. The best part is that I get to win everything I want while playing with all my cards face up.
I was known as the nicest guy ever, which is what will make my plan work out. I will become known as crazy; so crazy that it will give genuinely nice people a bad name! And because I will be so world-famous it will have a very world-wide effect, fucking up a lot of things!
Doesn't help that nice people have it bad already. "Beware of the nice ones!" they say. They'll be treated as crazy in turn of me looking so absolutely fucking nuts. And that effect will tear society apart. Gotta leave it to the dumb and unintelligent to break shit up!
And people will be endlessly fascinated with me. Oh yes, absolutely. Their interpretations of my character will be so ridiculously inconsistent because the public is unable to comprehend me. And plus there will always be interesting information and rumors about me abound! It'll make people who have associated with me in the past in some sort of way reach ridiculous levels of fame they have never reached before! And they'll probably be incredibly overwhelmed and embarrassed by it! Ouch! Also some people will wonder why the hell I'm so much like Princess Luna; but why is that!?!?!?
And I'll plead guilty to everything I've done.
Some word of advice to my serious admirers. Don't argue with your enemies. Cut them off and ignore them. Doing that will hurt their psychology with great magnitude and it will make them feel like they're not doing something right.
And I don't just believe in God, I know.
I will take the greatest fall, and in turn I will perform the greatest rise in existence. A fitting path of detachment for me, hm?
I will be waiting for the end of the universe to happen very soon. Enjoy your stupid arguments and fights in the meantime! I will be enjoying this whole ride.
I am Solias Maitreya, and I don't live a life with regrets.
I am Destiny.